Something that is both amusing and interesting to me is how uncomfortable people are with silence. I think it’s because in silence, often, you have nowhere to look or go but inward and that is a very difficult thing for some. Noise and continual conversation is what keeps people from being still and having to address the voices (yes, voices) that echo in our minds. While there are many noises, voices, and distractions, amidst all of that, if we listen close enough, we can hear the beautiful whispers of God.
The past few days I have been a bit quieter than usual because I have been trying to intentionally have less noise in my life so I can listen for his still small whispers. As a result, I have been asked over and over again if I am all right. The answer to that question has been and will continue to be, yes, I am fine.
Journaling my prayers has been very effective in my life over the past few months in both communicating with and hearing from God. However, something changed this week and I seemed to have hit a stone-wall (because we have stone-walls typically in England, not brick). I honestly believe this is God’s time and plan for my life. Allow me to explain.
On Wednesday I began a book study with the FYM team on a book called “The Art of Listening Prayer” which is written by Seth Barnes, the founder and CEO of Adventures in Missions. While I have read this book before, I believe God desires to teach, speak, and breathe something new into me, thus, the stone wall in the way I would normal communicate with and hear from him.
Today was day three of the study and entitled “Is our ‘personal’ relationship with Jesus really personal?” Seth parallels how he met his wife and his relationship with her today with his relationship with Christ. He talked about his pursuit of his wife and how he just had to get to know her saying: “All I knew was that I had to get to know this stranger who had captured my heart” (Seth Barnes “The Art of Listening Prayer” p 35). How beautiful is that idea, the pursuit and challenge of getting to know the one who has captured your heart?
This idea or concept of pursuing someone who has captured your heart is very common to us today in a romantic sense. However, to many it might feel strange to think being lovesick pursuing the ultimate beloved, God. I desire to be lovesick for my beloved, my friend, for only he can satisfy.
So, this is the season I find myself transitioning into. The words of the song “Lovesick” by Misty Edwards capture my thoughts and emotions best in this moment:
Lovesick
Verse 1:
I am lovesick, for my beloved, my beloved and my friend
So very lovesick, for my beloved, my beloved and my friend
Only you can satisfy, only you can satisfy
Bridge 1:
Try as I may to chase another lover, I find there is, there is no other 2x
For only you can satisfy, only you can satisfy
Chorus 1:
And happy am I to live a hungry life, blessed am I to thirst
Disillusionment, it is my gift within, I am blessed, I am blessed, among men
Verse 2:
To be lovesick, for my beloved, my beloved and my friend
So very lovesick, for my beloved, my beloved and my friend
Only you can satisfy, only you can satisfy
Bridge 2:
Try as may to chase another lover, I find there is there is no other 2x
All the other lovers fade away 3x Only you can satisfy 2x
Chorus 2:
And happy am I to live a hungry life, and blessed am I to thirst
My desire for you, it is my gift within, I am blessed, I am blessed, among men 2x
Refrain:
This is the generation that’s tried everything, this is the generation of Jacob
This is the generation that has done all those things
But only you can satisfy, only you can satisfy (Whole refrain 2x)
Chorus 3:
And the Spirit and the bride say come, oh the Spirit and the bride say come
We say come, we say come 2x
I invite you to welcome the silence and even to ask for a stone-wall. I welcomed the silence and did not expect the stone-wall, but it’s where I have encountered God in this new season. Seth Barnes wrapped up the chapter I wrote of previously saying “we must suspend our expectations of how he will respond to us” (Seth Barnes “The Art of Listening Prayer” p 38).
“He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. After he has gathered his own flock, he walks ahead of them, and they follow him because they recognize his voice” (John 10:3b-4 NLT).
In the noise and in the silence, may you recognize his voice today.
Chad
